Cornfields and Trains

So it's been a while. I know. I had a rough transition back to the States. I actually have three or four blog posts that are sitting here in draft form from after I got back that I couldn't finish. Perhaps someday.

In the meantime, the latest news is that I'm now in the great state of Indiana. We moved her for my husband's job. Our apartment complex is smack dab in the middle of cornfields off of  "county road 250" and the closest object of interest are train tracks about half a mile down the road. In either direction.

You can't make this stuff up.

I always thought where I grew up in Ohio was rural. Just kidding.

But anyway, the most positive thing about this experience so far is that when we moved here, we decided that Abigail needs to work on her writing. I've been doing freelance work for an advertising company out of Canton so that brings some money in and then in between unpacking boxes, walking our dogs and watching ridiculous YouTube videos, I write for myself. That aspect of it I like.

I like being able to set my schedule and do something that I love. When I was in Russia one thing I wrote in my journal is that the desire of my heart was to be able to stay home and write. Looks like God's given me just that opportunity.

So stay tuned for more about writing, life and the culture shock of switching states.

The Joys of Calling Eastern Europe (And Other Missions Things I've Discovered)

I'm supposed to be calling Eastern Europe. And Finland. You see, Russia has some interesting visa laws. Namely that a foreigner can't be there longer than three months. So we are trying to work out that once my visa expires I can go to a nearby country and get it renewed in either a couple days or a couple of weeks rather than three months.

Here's the thing about calling Eastern Europe. It's difficult. Why? Well, because of the tiny detail that there is a time difference. No big deal right? Except that the consular information people I've been trying to call are only there from 9am to 12pm. No big deal right? Well you see, that's 9-12 their time. Which is like the middle of the night here.

So not only does taking care of this business require calling in the middle of the night, but it also requires that I call the right department, the people actually pick up the phone, and I am able to talk to the supervisors. etc. Yes, it's been interesting times.

In other news, the fundraising has been going pretty well. I told my parents the other day that Someone must want me to go on this trip because I've been able to raise quite a bit with minimal effort so far. Not that I'm trying to brag. I just think it's interesting. I have about a third of what I need for the entire year in Russia. Which is amazing! God and the people I've talked to have been extremely generous. I am extremely blessed! Just because I have a third of what I need though doesn't mean that I don't have more to raise. Please continue to pray for me as I go through this process and try to get the rest of the support to go!

In my personal devotional time, I've been reading though Acts due to the mission work that goes on. It's been taking me longer than usual because I've been reading it in Russian as well as English. I read the chapter in English then spend a few days reading it a few verses at a time in Russian, writing down and looking up words I don't know. I don't have a lot of Russian church vocabulary and so am hoping that this will help increase it. It's been an interesting experience and one that I am greatly enjoying.

That's really all I've got for the moment. Things seem to be going pretty well. Again, your prayers are appreciated!

Falling In Love

It's not quite been a year since my last post. I don't know why I haven't written in so long. I think part of it was that I felt like I didn't really have anything to write about and part of it was that I was working on writing some other things. I've had this pressing, nagging desire to make a new blog entry for probably a week or so and just haven't done it. So what better time to do it than when I should be working on two Russian presentations and a ten page paper. All of which are due the latter half of next week. Fun fun.

Anyway, something very important happened to me last fall and something else very important happened several weeks ago. I think that's why I suddenly feel the need to write again. Namely, I fell in love. You see, ever since I got back from exchange and started on my career at SPU, I've been looking for direction in my life. Before I left for Russia, I figured that direction was in Translation. Ha. No. It didn't take me long to figure out how much I hate translating things. It's horrible. Moving on, what else did I want to do? Well obviously something with Russian since I worked so hard to learn it. So we'll make that my major. But what can you really do with a Russian major? Let's be honest, not much. So what did I do? Well I like politics and want to work for the government so International Relations is where it's at right? Um no. I discovered that I strongly dislike politics and theory, although political movements fascinate me. I think it's the social people thing.

So I dropped the IR major and continued to take my Russian. I decided that last fall I was going to take classes that sounded interesting and go from there. I made one of the best decisions of my life. I took a class about Conflict Management. SPU has a CM major due in part to it's little historical incident. (Which by the way, we well be celebrating...oops..."commemorating" in a few days) I had a friend tell me the Conflict Management class was good. I took it and oh my word I fell in love! I looked forward to that class every day we had it. I didn't mind doing the readings for it or the homework because it was fascinating and didn't seem like work. It was just fun. I would go out to eat with my parents and tell them all about the stuff I was learning and they would comment about how they could tell that this stuff was lighting up my brain. Reflective Listening, Mediation all of it lit up my brain. But the thing that lit up my brain the most was Nonviolence. It fascinated me, the way that people throughout history have used nonviolent techniques to effect social change, and how well it actually works. Yes, I'm talking Gandhi, Tolstoy, Martin Luther King Jr. And others who you've probably never even heard of.

Right then and there I decided that I wanted to devote my life to the CM department and eventually go out into the world to combat violence. Or something like that. I still didn't have a clear picture. So I declared CM as my second major. Who cared if it would keep me at Kent another three years.

Then another funny thing happened several weeks ago. A friend came from Colorado to spend her spring break at SPU. She had attended here a semester because of the CM program. She's the one who had told me about it. Because of her, I knew that it exsisted. We were talking about graduating and going out into the world. And I was telling her how I was getting tired of being here, but my majors were going to keep me here several more years. I was like "Yeah, If I were just doing Russian I could graduate next May. But what can you do with a Russian major?" Besides, my passion was Conflict Management. My random observation got me to thinking though. What if I did graduate next May?

I tried to put the thoughts aside but they kept coming back. I started thinking about grad school. Grad school was always something I thought I might do, maybe, down the road some time in the future. But then it hit me. If I got my major in Russian, I could graduate from SPU next May and go to grad school. Within three years I could come out with a Master's in Peace studies whereas if I stayed at SPU I would only have two BAs in the same amount of time. This seemed like the way to go. So I started researching like crazy, and talked to the head of the CM dept among others. Suddenly I found myself with a lot to do in a rather short period of time.

I'm really excited though. I feel like Grad school is the way to go. For the first time in a long time, I feel like I have a direction of sorts in my life. A direction I'm really excited to be going. I don't know where it's going to take me career-wise but I know that I want to do something with Nonviolence and CM on an international level.

I think part of the reason for this post is not just a general update, but also to let you know that once again this Blog is evolving. From High School through Rotary to College, and now it's on to Grad School. I feel like more of my posts are going to be focusing on this in the future. Wish me luck! :)

A job, A chance, an E-mail, and Why Exchange Messed Up My Life

I almost died the last week of school. Not really. But there were a couple of days there where I wasn't sure that I was going to make it. The stress was absolutely insane! The good news, however is that I made it out alive and mostly intact and brought some interesting memories out with me. Which is all good.

The most exciting news during the last week of the semester was that I finally heard from the people in charge of the Language School. I got the job as a Teaching Assistant! I'm pretty excited about this although I haven't heard anymore details. I do know however that the camp runs from the middle of June to the middle of July. My guess is that I will be hearing all the details of what I'm supposed to be doing, two days before I'm supposed to be back up at SPU. But hey, I'm not complaining. Rather, I am very much forward to beating Russian into those little high schoolers. No, I'm just kidding. I'm not really that mean :P

It's ironic. I was writing a letter to Elena Ivanovna the other day. It's mostly done, just have to finish it up, put a picture with it, stamp and send it. This is ironic because today I checked my e-mail and there was a short note from Nina in it. I had gotten back in touch with her several months ago and she e-mailed me, but I never replied back because (My excuses were) my computer was having issues and then I got really busy at the end of the semester. But really there's no excuse. I'm planning on e-mailing her back within the next few days. It's just so hard sometimes. It's like there's a part of me that doesn't want to be in touch and I don't know why I should even feel that way...

In other news, there is a slight chance that I might be able to get a scholarship to go back to Russia and study in a university there for a year. I don't want to say too much about it at the moment, because I may not even get it, but hopefully there will be more details to follow.

Which brings me to the thing I've been thinking about lately. Namely, How Going on Exchange Has Screwed Up My Life. When I found out about, and got the application for this scholarship, I was pretty excited, but at the same time, I was hesitant. There was a part of me that definitely didn't want to apply for the scholarship (Perhaps that is related to the staying in touch thing?). I was like "yeah, I should apply for this" but it was like something within me said. "but you don't really want to." and I thought about it for a while. Exchange was a fascinating experience. It was filled with some amazing moments and experiences. So why did a part of me not want to take the opportunity to do it again? Then suddenly, it hit me. I realized that I was scared.

Though most of the bad things about exchange have been outweighed by the good, there was a part of me that still remembered it. Remembered how hard it was, how scary, how difficult, how lonely it could be. This part of me was projecting. I didn't want to go back to Russia because I didn't want to have to deal with those things. The Beauraucracy, the visas, breaking down the Russian facade. A part of me was going "NO! NO! NO!" while the sensible part of me was saying "Get back on the horse." And then, God stepped in. I had decided to apply, but wasn't as enthusiastic about it as I could have been. I was going over some paperwork with my mom and we were discussing things when I found something significant on the website for the scholarship. Basically what it sounded like was that the scholarship was going to be discontinued starting this next year. The wave of disappointment that washed over me was undescribable. I e-mailed my contact about the scholarship, asking for clarification and asking whether or not I should go ahead and reply.

I was in a mood the rest of the evening. I didn't even know for sure if I could still apply or not, but already I was really disappointed. Just the thought of not even having the slightest chance of getting to go back was heavy on my chest. I spent the rest of the evening playing all the Russian songs I know on my guitar and feeling rather down.

You may have guessed by now, what my contact's answer to the inquiry was. The next morning, I checked my e-mail the first thing and was overjoyed to see that I could still go ahead and apply. And that set it. I am applying. But I think it was necessary for me to have that moment of doubt. Because in that one moment, I realized that the overwhelming disappointment of not being able to go, completely outweighed the nervousness I felt about going back for a second round.

And this is how exchanged messed me up. I am forever tied to Russia. To the World. There will always be a part of me that takes great interest in what the Motherland is doing, a part of me that still lives there. A part of me that is always longing to go back. I am forever tied to the Global community, forever hungering to see and experience more. But is that necesarily a bad thing? I dreamed in Russian last night, and in the light of day, I cannot remember what the dream was about, but it was full of good feelings.

Housecleaning

In case you haven't noticed, I've been playing with the template, fonts, and so on. I figured that since I hadn't really updated the look of the blog since I started it in 2005, it was about time that I did, so please just bear with me as I'll be playing with various things over probably the next couple of weeks until I decide on something I like. Do not worry, neither the quality nor the Frequency of my posts will be affected by this. It's just something I feel I need to do. Need something different for a while.

Quickness

I don't have long. Feel like I haven't updated in forever. I'll try to do a couple of longer more detailed updates when I can. Basically the upshot is after district conference, I got sick in a major way. Not fun. Especially since Emmaline, my lovely Canadian exchange friend was going to be showing up here. So I did my best to get better and was mostly so by the time she came.

We had many adventures. Some of which I will follow up in a later post in more detail. Some of which you may never hear. The upshot though is that I've now seen Ice in June, Drunk water straight from a creek, seen the main road out of Yaktusk, Been underground surrounded by permafrost, Seen most of a play in Yakutian and talked about various boys in English without them understanding a word. Yeah. Life it good.

Oh and we had Graduation. I'll tell you about that too in more detail when I get a chance, but honestly, it wasn't nearly that big of a deal. Last Bell was much more interesting and exciting Culture-wise. This past week went really fast thanks to our visitor. It was nice. Now, I've got twenty days left until I get home. It's weird to think that three saturdays from now I'm going to be sitting down to a home-cooked meal with my entire family. Surreal. I want it to feel like I'm going home soon but it doesn't. I have my tickets, I'm going to be packing. Why doesn't it feel real? But then, I had the same problem coming the other way too. It didn't hit me that I'd be spending ten months in Russia until I actually got here.

Anyway, that's all for now as my internet time is limited. Look for more updates in the next few days.